So drunk a car ran over me & I didn’t feel it.
The year I had an offer to be a prostitute
As I waited in the hallway at 3rd and 9th
With the door open.
The year Kathleen Hanna took off
Her shirt and exposed her perfect breasts,
Then reprimanded everyone for looking.
The year, Tim, the guy I had been seeing,
Said he LOVED “cowboy eggs,” so I made them
For like 2 weeks to please him. There’s a hole
In the middle you make with a small cup--
Like a shot glass, then put the yolk in the hole.
He broke up with me even though I had
Perfected the technique. It was the year
Of Blur vs Oasis when Noel Gallagher
Said Damon Albarn & Alex James should
“Catch AIDS and die.”
The year I wore chockers and drank an entire
Bottle of methadone I had stolen
From a friend.
It was the year I discovered I had antibodies
For Hep C and slight erosion of the liver.
The year I gave up drinking for pot & had
My first experience with MDMA.
The year Brittany Spears had a reality show
And I thought, she’s just a nice, down-home
Girl with probably a really pushy mother.
The year I started Grad school, got certified,
Fired, and lost my shit.
The year of electronic town criers, blogs,
Extraverts, and wild kindness.
Olivia lives in Brooklyn, where she teaches expository writing and fundamentals of critical reading. She is the author of the chapbooks, Cat Lament and Being Female.